As of this past Monday... a particular season of my life came to a close. (Well, barring any bona fide miracles, that is.) I took my youngest child to his first day of kindergarten... and left empty handed! After almost 10 years of having a little one by my side 24/7... it was over. Just like that. Over!! One minute, I was clicking off pictures & all smiles... the next minute, I was a teary-eyed mess! I knew I had to get out of there quick... and have a little "moment" to collect myself.
My husband seemed mildly surprised at my reaction (like... "uhhh - you're not *really* going to get too carried away here, are you?") But, I tear up for books, movies, weddings of people who are practically strangers to me.... even a good commercial every once in a while, for goodness sakes!! What was he thinking? This was certainly a good occasion for a few teardrops, right?!
I guess to be completely honest though... I was surprised at myself, too. I knew it would be an emotional day... but, here's the thing... I think that because I could see this situation coming (after all, I had those same 10 years to prepare)... and I had given it some thought as to how it would feel.... that somehow I believed I could escape the emotional impact of walking t-h-r-o-u-g-h it. It was like right smack dab in the middle of it, I realized --- "ohhhh... now I see.... this really is hard."
Funny thing is... this scenario has been playing out repeatedly for me lately. I think I see what's coming & then I'm overwhelmed when it comes to pass. I'm not sure I've discovered any great pearls of wisdom here... except maybe this... if you see a reoccuring pattern - pay attention! There's gotta be a lesson in it.
And, probably more important...
I've certainly been reminded of the necessity of prayer. Most of the time, we tend to sideline prayer... we see it as something optional. But, there are days when your spirit will truly need it to take those next few steps forward. Because it is in prayer we realize that we aren't walking t-h-r-o-u-g-h it alone.
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7
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2 comments:
Hey friend,
Tomorrow I drop my youngest at preschool for the first time. Yesterday my junior in college daughter left to go back to school. I understand how you are feeling. But you're right...we are never alone. And, you will have so much more blogging time...!
We must've been reading each other's blogs at the same time! Actually, that particular sentence came straight from God...it's one of the few I didn't change...for whatever that's worth.
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